On the other hand, I don’t think that gendered space on the female side of things is any less dangerous (sk*rt, for example, bothers me just as much as digg if not more). However I’ve also been a part of communities online where gender and gender discrimination becomes very much a non-issue– to the extent where long-time members are often still surprised to find out the gender of other long-time members. I think there is a lot of internal work done by that specific community to keep the tone civil, the interactions non-aggressive and the general sense of things “friendly” to everyone.

As a women’s studies BA with a strong interest in masculinity studies I struggle constantly with the issue of gendered spaces. Are the necessarily bad? I get frustrated with women’s only spaces that see all men as the enemy, but I also value women’s only space as something somewhat sacred and important. I think part of why I love this podcast so much is that while it’s approaching technology from a women’s perspective it isn’t trying to compete or out geek or out cute the gender-neutral but inevitably male dominated tech podcasts, it’s just brining something different to the table. It somehow gets away from the dynamic that grosses me out when intelligent geek women guest host on other geeky podcasts and somehow feel the need to out geek (by being super serious) or seduce the audience and/or their cohost.

So thanks girls! It’s great to see things like this existing!

Liana, I think your experience emailing with other women is really interesting. To me, that lack of participation, or the need for permission or approval is very gendered. In traditional society, women must ask permission and they aren’t supposed to speak out. From birth (some argue even before) we receive messages and lessons teaching us how to think, act and believe in this world. I know I’m starting to sound really “gender studies” at this point, but I think it’s worth taking a second look at just what we all bring to the table in our online interactions, and if these things about our contributions fall in line with what we believe it means to be a woman or a man.

Can you tell this paper is taking over my brain?!

Being a women in the social conversation is liberating for those who might not otherwise speak for fear of being laughed at or disregarded, because they still believe technology is a man thing. I have several friends who still don’t participate in great conversations like this one, because they believe they have to be a geek to do so. If you ask them, they say they aren’t geeky enough because they don’t program or build websites, as if these kinds of technical skills is at all relevant to being social. There is still a large need to help women feel comfortable online, in addition to but different than privacy controls. There are a lot of women who are still looking for permission to be a part of the conversation. It sounds dated, but I have emailed and spoken with many, many women who just need and want to be told it is okay.

I see the web as being even ground for men and women.

Peronsally I’ve discovered my social conversation on the web is not dictated by my gender but is dictated by my personality. Offline I am someone that listens intently and observes conversation and interaction. I want to fully understand the topic and the personalities before I share my thoughts. I do this online also. I find I’m still feeling my way around and am slowly participating because I want my comments to be as meaningful and as impactful as what I’m reading. I want to offer something useful in exchange for all I’m learning.

Is my personality dictated by my gender? Am I this way because I am a woman? I don’t think. I think I’m this way because of me, my family and my influences and environment growing up.

I think a key recent development that has made online participation more attractive for women (and really everyone) is privacy control that allows one to block abusive or annoying users. Really, this has been a boon for everyone on the web, but particularly for women, who far more often face very unpleasant and downright threatening behavior from the spammers, haters and stalkers who hide behind their anonymity. I recently blogged about the power to “unfollow” (a Twitter term) and how it has led to such a pleasant and welcoming community on Twitter.

As to interaction, I think both men and women tend to treat the other gender differently online, but pretty much with the same differences as we treat each other in person. Hmmm. Did that make any sense at all?